Coming to a close

Well, some years have passed since my last entry in this blog. My time here has been indeed interesting. I've seen how others do things and I've been impressed by my team and their ability to run so many technologies with so little staff. I've met some nice people too -- I'll miss H and M when I actually go.

Changes is afoot

It's been months since I've updated this blog. A lot has been going on ... for starters, I'll have to say that I'm finally begining to get used to life here in Tokyo. Over time, I've begun to see that there are good things in this city as well. I've settled into a routine and work has become less stressful. I guess I've also begun to let go of the things I missed about home a bit too.

Speaking of work, I've just accepted the Systems Manager job. This is not because I am necessarily qualified, just that I am the only one on the team who is semi-competant and/or seems to give a shit. So odd, that in seven months time, I have taken my boss's job. My boss quit, which really was what set all this in motion by the way. He went to a hedge fund in HK to make more money and presumably retire early. Smart man.

Ryoko and the kids are good. They are in Okinawa at the moment visiting her parents. It's only been a few days, but I miss my kids. They drive me a little batty when they are here, in this small little apartment, but I sure do miss them when they are not here. Ryoko's brother, Hidetaka, was nice enough to make me a photo album of Keven the last time they were in Okinawa. Keven was 1.5 years old at the time. I look at it from time to time when I especially miss them.

Well, overall, things are OK. Not too much to complain about I suppose. Just trying to get the most out of this experience as I can, workwise and in other ways.

Been a while...

It's been a few months since I've posted. I guess I've been pretty busy. Since my last post, I've moved to Japan and just moved into a new apartment in a district that is about 20 minutes away (by train) from work. The district is called Yoyogi-Uehara and seems pretty kid friendly. It is across the street from the train station so the walk will be easy each morning and evening. It's pretty expensive compared to where we lived before, but probablly not as expensive as NY. The one good thing about real estate here is that there IS availability and the range is quite large -- meaning you can find lots of places in lots of different areas for lots of different price categories. It's not like Manhattan, where there's no apartments to be had.

The job is OK. It's just a means-to-an-end and that's the attitude I'm trying to maintain. The company is small, but it's pretty laid back for financial services firm. There's some weird politics and the company is in a transitional phase right now, but I guess you get that anywhere you work.

Ryoko and the kids seem OK considering all the change lately. Kalen just started to crawl more than a few paces last nigt. Keven is growing taller and has nearly grown out of his Maclaren stroller that Ken and Karen gave him. Ryoko says she feels more 'comfortable' here in Japan than she did in the US. I guess I can relate, as I definately felt more comfortable in the US than here in Japan.

Sound and Fury

On the No. 2 train down to South Seaport today, I enountered a throng of deaf people. Actually, it seemed like the entire car was filled with deaf riders. As the car sped down the tracks, into and out of tunnels, there was no usual chatter to compete with the drone and hiss of metal on metal. Despite this fact, I can tell there were lively conversations happening. Conversations probably not unlike those you and I would have, just devoid of sound.

Deaf people gesticulate more with their bodies. Hands waving, arms pumping, stiffened posture, faces contorted with emotion. It was beatiful to watch. I could tell that there was a bond in their disability. I wish I knew how to sign. The sight brought me back to a documentary film I saw a few years ago about deaf culture and the cochlear implant. The cochlear implant is a device that emits electrical signals directly to the brain and essentially allows a restoration of hearing.

Here's a link to the documentary film. It's a great film. It's been years since I last saw it, but I remember it vividly.

http://www.pbs.org/wnet/soundandfury/

Mover's regret?

I am begining to think that this was not such a smart career move. Actually, I thought this after Kalen was born. This feeling of regret is really getting in the way of me be able to accept and enjoy this new job of mine.

I ditched a good job, a comfortable life and a chance to learn Basis SAP, one of the hottest skills in the future, to come learn some niche technologies in the financial services field (Sybase, Unix, Perl). I can try to focus on Oracle, but I feel that I've made a big career mistake by doing this move and I will be less marketable upon my return to the US.

I am just plain homesick. I don't want to be here in NYC. I'm also aprehensive about my future... where will I work upon my return? How marketable will my skill set be? All this uncertainy and difficulty and hardship ... is it all worth it? Was leaving a quality life behind and facing even more uncertainty upon my return, worth it? Don't know in the long run, but at this point, the answer is decidely 'no'.

It's too late now, I just have to make the best of it. The money is good, but at this point, I am pretty miserable.

End of week two.

Two weeks in NYC -- the jury so far is that it's good to visit, but not to stay. It takes a lot of you to have to compete for EVERYTHING; from the little spit of space on the subway train to the that apartment next to the park. Everything is about competition - New York City style.

Work has been an adjustment for sure. People here are quite bright and have quite a bit of moxy. There are some egos here, but people are, for the most part, OK. It's been difficult for me to learn the systems and processes. They expect people to be good at all aspects of systems work ... servers, networks, phone systems, databases, scripting... the list goes on. Today, they had me swap out the power supply of Solaris v480R machine. I had no idea even where to begin. This type of thing seems to get harder as one gets older.

I'm glad the weekend is here.

It's been a week here in NYC and I think I've finally gotten the hang of using the subway system to get around town. The subways attract all manner of NYC life, just today I saw a few rats about 8 inches long scurrying around on the A line 14th street platform. People just ignored them. You want to see New Yorkers, go to take a train.

I find people here not rude, but not nice either. It's just a big city with a lot of people in it and if you don't like crowds, you won't like NYC. There are crowds everywhere and everyone is in a hurry. There's a certain energy here that makes the city special, but really, it's best for a young people without children.